Realization
by challah
Summary: JD moment set after "Manchester II"
1. realization part 1

Realization

Note: this is my first attempt at J/D or West Wing fanfic- please send me your comments!

Josh/Donna

Set after "Manchester II"

Red, white and blue balloons waved festively in the autumn breeze as the Columbia HS marching band played a rousing Sousa tune. Emotions were running high as President Bartlet made his official campaign announcement in the hills of New Hampshire. Although it was meticulously scripted by Bruno and others, Donna felt a chill as the president spoke eloquently to the assembled crowd, many of whom had supported him during the first campaign as well as when he was governor of New Hampshire. The feeling of working for President Bartlet was wonderful, and it never went away. Sure, sometimes after a long week of wrangling with the staff of various legislators (not to mention Josh), she was tired- but she loved this job. Sighing quietly, she felt patriotic and content and excited all at once. Although the campaign ahead would be brutal, especially with the upcoming subpoenas, she was confident in President Bartlet, and in the senior staff that he would be reelected.

"Donna!"

She could hear Josh bellowing from miles away, it seemed. Josh. The man for whom she works, the Deputy Chief of Staff. A man that was enigmatic and infantile and complex and made her feel..._alive._ She respected Josh a great deal, but tried not to let him see that- or he would be unbearable. Donna felt that it was her job to keep his ego somewhat in check. The thing about Josh- Donna tried not to think about what made her feel so... happy when she was with him. True, she finds him attractive, and there is a spark- they had witty banter, and sweet moments-- sometimes she thinks that he is her best friend. Of course, since she spends twelve to sixteen hours a day with him at the White House, she doesn't socialize too much anyway. But what she has with Josh is a special relationship; something that the other assistants don't have with their staff. Her relationship with Josh is important to her, and she keeps her feelings hidden from the other assistants, especially when they are gossiping or complaining about office problems.

Lost in thought, she hears Josh call her again as he walks up the steps to where she is standing on the stage, watching the crowd disperse. "Donna? Didn't you hear me calling for you?" Turning, she says quickly," Is it time to go? Is the motorcade ready?" Scanning her face, Josh replied," Yes, he's almost finished with the rope line. Do you have the paperwork for HR.393 and the Skinner meeting so that we can go over it on the way?" Donna nodded affirmatively, and added," Also, you have a 6:00 on the Hill with Mark Robertson." "Really?" Josh whined. "When did that get added?" Donna replied,"Leo added to your schedule this afternoon, because of the upcoming floor vote." "'Kay." Josh and Donna started down the hill, headed for the motorcade that would take them to Air Force One, parked at a nearby base.

As they found their places in the deserted staff area of Air Force one, Josh spread papers on the floor and table in messy piles as Donna settled down with his laptop, working on the research that Josh had requested for the upcoming child welfare reform legislation. Sinking into the cushy leather seat, Donna closed her eyes for a second, reflecting on her general happy mood. Considering that the subpoenas would be handed down next week, she didn't have too much reason to be optimistic about the next week-- but she was just happy to be alone in the staff area, working with Josh.

"Hey, are you OK?" She opened her eyes to see Josh leaning over her, looking worried. "Are you too tired? We have a lot of work to get done tonight, but you could take a quick nap if you need to. I could wake you up when we're over D.C. I know that you didn't get too much sleep last night, especially with Carol and Margaret up talking." Donna smiled at his concern, and was about to reply when she suddenly felt water dripping onto her thin blouse. She let out a small cry, and started to jump up from her seat, saying "Josh, are you trying to use your powers of Chinese water torture on me?" As she stood up, she collided with Josh, who looked confused and then glanced down at the glass in his hand. "Oh... sorry. Want me to get you a towel?" She nodded, and Josh started to leave the room. Suddenly turning around, he looked at the soaked front of her blouse, and said," A towel is not going to help that. I'm giving you my shirt." He began to unbutton his shirt, and shrugged it off, handing it to Donna. She could still feel his warmth emanating from the blue oxford as she stared at Josh. Feeling as though it was difficult to breathe, she told Josh, "Turn around." As a cocky but shy grin played across his face, he turned toward the window, secretly watching her reflection as she removed her blouse and put his on. "You can turn around now," she said, as she finished buttoning his shirt, reveling in his scent and warmth as she rolled up the sleeves.

Looking at her with his shirt on, sleeves rolled and the hem reaching almost to the bottom of her skirt, he felt a wave of happiness crash over him. This was what he wanted, and for the first time in his life, he wasn;t sure how to get there. Donna was his assistant, and there was already a scandal brewing for the Bartlet administration. He realized, maybe consciously for the first time, that he was in love with Donna, that she was the one that held him together emotionally as well as professionally. He realized that he was happier over the past four years than he had ever been.

This was what he wanted, and for the first time in his life, he wasn't sure how to get there. For now, he would just enjoy sitting next to her on Air Force One, leaning into her warmth as they worked on legislation and bantered with each other. That was enough, for now.

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	2. realization part 2

"This is Captain Foley speaking. We will be landing at Andrews Air Force Base in approximately twenty-two minutes. Washington D.C. time is currently 9:54 pm, and the temperature is 54 degrees Fahrenheit."

Groggily, Josh awakened in stages, finding that while the leather seats on Air Force One looked plush and inviting, his back was still cramped from sleeping in an awkward position. As he started to move, he realized that Donna's head was still resting on his shoulder, and her fingers had become inexplicably intertwined with his own at some point while they were both asleep. He smiled, and carefully looked around to see if they were being observed. Fortunately, the staff cabin was still deserted- CJ and Toby must have stayed in the other conference room, working with Sam, Bruno and Connie on the upcoming campaign strategies. Momentarily, he wondered why they hadn't come to get him- and then he decided that he didn't care.

Quietly inhaling the scent of Donna's hair, he felt peace flow over him. These were some of the moments that he cherished most from the first campaign, and from the past three years in office: the quiet times where he and Donna fell asleep together. Of course, it was perfectly innocent in the fact that they had never pursued a romantic relationship, and it would be no lie to say that nothing physical had happened with them-- their bond was much deeper than that. Without speaking a word, Josh felt that Donna understood their relationship-- knew the pitfalls that would lie ahead if they verbally acknowledged their mutual attraction-- and so, they performed this delicate ballet of banter and subterfuge and misdirection because to give in, to consciously admit their feelings aloud-- would be the end of their working relationship, at least for now.

Soon, he would have to wake her up, let her know that they were landing at Andrews. From experience, he knew how cold he would feel once her warm body was no longer safely nestled against his chest, how bereft his shoulder and hand would feel without her touch. He wasn't ready to face that feeling just yet- and so he stayed still, memorizing her heartbeat and matching her relaxed breathing to his own, not wanting to leave the moment just yet, even though his shoulder ached from the position.

"Josh?" came her sleepy voice, several minutes later. "Josh, are we there yet?"

"Shh... yes, we'll be landing at Andrews in about ten minutes," said Josh quietly.

Donna slowly pulled herself to a sitting position, smoothing her hair and rubbing her eyes. As she started to rise from the chair, Josh impulsively gave her a quick hug before she left his arms. She looked surprised for a moment, and a flicker of... something... showed in her eyes for a second, and then the mask of professionalism settled back on her face. She casually walked over to the bathroom and returned a moment later, wearing her (now dry, but wrinkled) blouse, handing him back his shirt. As he put it back on over his t-shirt, and started to button it, he joked,"Wow, looks like someone slept in this." She returned, "At least this time, it wasn't you and your sensitive system!" They both smiled, as the banter (safely back in place), brought them back to their accustomed roles.

Quickly packing up the files that were scattered over the tables and floor, Donna restored order to the room and returned to her seat as the intercom announced the imminent landing. As Air Force One taxied onto the runway, Josh and Donna were discussing the schedule for the next day. "Josh, do you think that the subpoenas will be handed down this week?"

"I'd be surprised if they weren't handed down starting tomorrow, just to try to get them into the current news cycle. Donna-- you know that you will probably be subpoenaed as well, right? They are going to ask you a lot of questions-- some polite, but most just to do some digging, see if they can find any dirt on the administration."

She looked at him. "So I shouldn't mention my Catholic schoolgirl uniform and my equipment to House Oversight?" she said playfully.

"Well...if you do, I may have to tell them about your favorite hobby-- philately," Josh smirked.

As the plane rolled to a stop, they gathered up their belongings and headed towards the cabin door, getting ready to join the rest of the staff to disembark. As Donna exited the room with Josh touching the small of her back, he looked back towards their seats and saw their reflection in the window. He smiled at the picture of them together.


End file.
